Redefining Fabulous

The Harsh Realities of Being a Mompreneur

Jessi Cabanin Season 1 Episode 14

LIFE is hard. But you know what's harder? Running a business and raising a human, all at the same time!

Today we're chatting about the harsh realities of being a mompreneur. It doesn't get more real than this folks.

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Until next time babe, keep pushing, keep dreaming, and let's keep on redefining fabulous.
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Jessi Cabanin:

Hey girl Hey, are you ready for some real talk? If you are a female entrepreneur who has ever felt like a total failure or maybe even a frequent flyer of imposter syndrome, this podcast is for you. I'm your host Jessi a millennial business owner, boy mom and creative genius helping women bring their business dreams to life. After 10 years of building numerous creative brands from the ground up, I'm ready to get real about what actually goes on behind the scenes of building your very own empire failure opened up brand new mindset for me and I really want that for you too, because honestly, I am just so over society's definition of what it means to live a successful life. So together, we are going to create and navigate a version of success that works for you. Together, we can redefine fabulous. Alright babe Happy Friday. Today is a passion filled episode. So today we are talking about the realities of being a mompreneur. Okay, so if you've never heard the word mompreneur before, it's pretty self explanatory. We are talking about women in business who are also mothers. Now, the biggest thing I want to talk about is the misconception of being a mompreneur. Okay. Lots of people will say, Oh, my God, that sounds so amazing. You make your own schedule. You travel when you want. You do whatever the heck you want. You swim in a pool in the middle of the day if you want. It's not that hard. Fuck that. It is so hard. Okay, it is so freakin hard. Like making your schedule is literally one of THE hardest parts of being a mompreneur. Because it's chaos. Things change, like by the minute. There is no just like making your own schedule, like shit changes. You have to be willing to pivot. And if you are someone who does not have a child and you find pivoting hard, pivoting is way harder as a mompreneur. Okay, I promise you it is so freakin hard not to mention the constant struggle and anxiety about roller coaster income. Okay, you get it. I know you get it. We are constantly worried about the ups and the downs of our income. And it takes a long time for a mompreneur to really build a business or side hustle or combination of both. That brings them a consistent residual income. That's hard. That's a really hard place I've been I've been in business for 12 years. And that is a really hard thing. Not only is it hard to get there, it's even harder to maintain it. Okay, so if you are out there thinking that being a mompreneur is not that hard. It's a luxury to be so flexible. Go check yourself, go check yourself with the door because that is could not be farther from the truth, like literally could not be farther from the truth. Okay. And then another thing is that nothing prepares you for it. Okay? You know, those people that tell you that like, pets are really good to prepare you for having kids. Okay, I get really angry at those people. So I hope you are not one of those people. But I get really angry at those people because they are just as wrong as the people who think they know what it's like to be a mompreneur. But aren't one, the people who say it's must be so great to be able to be so flexible, and it must be just the greatest thing ever. Don't get me wrong, there are perks, but it is not the greatest thing ever. It is not. And it will never be the greatest thing ever. Because it is so freakin hard. Okay, can we talk about pressure, like how much pressure there is to be a woman in business in general, much less to be a mom in business. There's this pressure to keep a business alive. But at the same time, you have to keep a human alive. You have to keep this human alive and you have to get them to thrive and grow and be respectable people like and if you don't, if your child acts out, if your child has tantrums, if your child pops into the room while you're on a zoom, call, all of a sudden, you're a failure. You can't keep it together. You can't keep your ducks in a row. What the fuck is up with that? Can we talk about that? Now let me say this. I know that a lot of that pressure is pressure we put on ourselves and I will fully acknowledge that I'm guilty as hell yeah, I'm guilty. But there's also this pressure that comes from the world that comes from social media. There's a pressure coming from social media from all Can we just stop like perfecting our lives on social media? Can we have more of the raw moments of life on social media because it adds to that pressure of feeling like you have to be perfect all the time as a mom as a business owner. That's bullshit. Like that is absolute bullshit. It is so, so hard. So I personally am going to make a pledge and I hope you will do this with me. I'm going to make a pledge to post more about the realities of what it is like to be a mompreneur. A little bit more behind the scenes of what it's like to try to get work done. While your child is climbing on you while your child is screaming in the background. I want to be more real about what it's like. Because I want to break that stigma. I want to break that misconception that being a mompreneur is not that hard. Because it's really freaking hard. really freaking hard. Okay, if you are at a point in your life, you're a mompreneur. And you are struggling. Right now you're struggling with time you're struggling with organization, you're struggling with impostor syndrome, you're struggling with comparing yourself to everybody out there on social media, to your friends, to your family, whatever. I'm going to tell you this. Okay, you need to learn to give yourself grace, and you need to embrace the fact that Done is better than perfect. Okay, now, this is not easy. This requires personal development, change requires change. And it will require you to take a step towards really being in tune with yourself, really being in tune with the things going on around you how they impact you, and how your residual feelings and impact of what's happening. Bounce Back on the rest of you. Okay, if I am pissed off about God knows what my son is now pissed off about God knows what, okay, it's contagious. I don't want that for him on a daily basis. Now, I am not saying that I will never have that I am not perfect. And I know that. But I'm trying to be more aware of those things. And I want to just say because I know you're thinking it being a mompreneur is lonely as fuck. It is so lonely, and it is so easy to get lost. Okay? Do you feel lost? Like, do you feel like you don't know what you're doing? You don't know what phase of life you're in. You're just lost? And then do you feel like you are scrolling the death Scroll of social media? Either looking, you don't even know what you're looking for. But you do know that when things come up in your feed, you start comparing yourself. Okay, so what happens is, we start to look outward for validation. We start to look for someone else to tell us that we're doing okay, or to compare ourselves to someone else. To say that we're doing better to say that we've got it under control. But as a mompreneur, I will tell you that looking outward is one of the worst things that you can do. It is the worst thing that you can do. Because nobody else is you comparing yourself to someone else, or what they're doing. It is not apples to apples, it will never be apples to apples. I say this all the time. It's easy to get lost in impostor syndrome. And I, for one, fully understand this, I am there on a monthly basis. I get it, guys. I'm not saying that I have figured out the magic recipe to just like mix it for life. But I am saying that I have found ways to get myself out of it. Because I've done the work. I've done the personal development work to understand the things that trigger me to understand the things that pulled me out of it. And that is growth. That's acknowledgement that's understanding that I am not perfect, and that the things that I'm trying to do perfectly, are never getting done. So Done is better than perfect. If your kid wants to eat chicken nuggets or just a spoon and catch up, pick your battles some days. Dinner is done. Dinner is better than perfect. Like anything is better than perfect. Okay, so something I want you to do right now. Right now, I want you to go text another mompreneur because I know you know other ones. And if you don't, that's a conversation for another day. I want you to go text a mompreneur right now. And tell her you're not alone. You're doing a great job. Because all of us need to hear that once in a while. All of us need that reminder that we're not alone. We're in this together, babe. All right, baby. I hope you really enjoyed today's Congress. Hey, so I'm super curious to know what your biggest takeaway was from today. So go ahead and share this episode on social media. Make sure you tag me at this way to fabulous and let me know what you connected with. What did you learn from the episode and what action item are you going to take today? Until next time, guys, keep pushing, keep dreaming. And let's keep on redefining fabulous chatroom guys