Redefining Fabulous

Coffee Convo with Stefanie O'Donnell : Overcoming Imposter Syndrome

March 18, 2022 Jessi Cabanin Season 1 Episode 3
Redefining Fabulous
Coffee Convo with Stefanie O'Donnell : Overcoming Imposter Syndrome
Show Notes Transcript

Today's episode is SUPER exciting as I broke ground with Stefanie O'Donnell on a totally brand new segment called "EmpowHERing Coffee Convos" over in my private FB group for EmpowHERed Entrepreneurs.

Join us for an unfiltered chat on Imposter Syndrome - what it is, how it effects us, and how the hell we get out of it.

Stefanie O'Donnell is a lifestyle family photographer and passionate philanthropist in Mount Prospect, Illinois. Connect with her via her brand spankin' new website (courtesy of moi 🤪)
➡️ www.stefanieodonnellphotography.com

Until next time babe, keep pushing, keep dreaming, and let's keep on redefining fabulous.
 
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on the 'gram... @thiswaytofabulous
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or join my free empowHERed entrepreneurs group for more FREE tips, tricks and live trainings!

Jessi Cabanin:

Hey girl, hey, are you ready for some real talk? If you are a female entrepreneur who has ever felt like a total failure or maybe even a frequent flyer of imposter syndrome, this podcast is for you. I'm your host Jessi I'm millennial business owner, boy mom and creative genius helping women bring their business dreams to life after 10 years of building numerous creative brands from the ground up, I'm ready to get real about what actually goes on behind the scenes of building your very own empire failure opened a brand new mindset for me and I really want that for you too, because honestly, I am just so over society's definition of what it means to live a successful life So together, we are going to create and navigate a version of success that works for you. Together, we can redefine fabulous all right, babe. Happy Friday. I am so excited about today's episode. Today we are breaking ground with a brand new segment called empowered coffee conversations with Jessie this is something that I started in my private business Facebook group, if you are not in their Head to facebook slash groups slash empower her your best to join us. And what we are doing is we are starting a conversation. Okay, so what I'm doing is bringing people on talking about topics that we don't like to talk about all the time, and just kind of breaking the stigma and starting a conversation. So today's episode was with Stephanie O'Donnell photography in Mount Prospect, Illinois, and today we are talking about imposter syndrome. Okay, we are talking about all of the different views of imposter syndrome, how it affects us how we get out of it. And she has some tips for you to get out of imposter syndrome if it's something that you're struggling with right now. So without further ado, let's dive in. Okay, all right. Cool. Okay, so welcome to an entirely new chapter of this way to fabulous, I am super excited there like there are like 100 adventures going on right now. I feel like I am like redefining the entire world at this point. But to go on top of my new website, my podcast, I am now launching this idea of having empowering conversations with other business owners, other women, other moms, and really just kind of opening the conversation for some of the things that we don't talk about, because you guys there are so many things that we don't talk about, and it's so silly. So I want to kind of bring this in and develop kind of a platform where we can kind of break a lot of these stigmas apart and really just talk about them. Because I think the number one thing that most of us don't realize is that we are not alone. I know what feels really lonely sometimes But the reality of this situation is we are not alone more than likely, um, there's not many people who aren't feeling the same way as you, there's just less people who are willing to like be open and talk about it. So my kind of like goal with this whole entire thing is to just open that conversation and kind of like to get moving with that. So thank you guys for joining us today. If you don't know who I am, my name is Jesse. I'm the chief empowerment Officer of this way to fabulous Inc. I'm a brand photographer, I am a designer. I'm a business coach. I am 1000 million things. I am definitely a multi passionate, but today I am here with Stephanie O'Donnell. She is amazing photographer in the Mount Prospect Illinois area. She's also a philanthropist, which is amazing. And we are here today to chat about imposter syndrome. Okay, so before we dive in stuff, why don't you tell everyone just like a little bit about yourself, like just a super quick synopsis of who you are and where you're at right now.

Stefanie O'Donnell:

Perfect. Well, if you know me, nothing is ever super quick. I like I said, I'm a photographer and mom prospect. I specialize in lifestyle newborn and I also do lifestyle family sessions. I have been doing it for about three years, I am now full time which is amazing. Um, that's about it. You do everything else for me, you helps me with everything else.

Jessi Cabanin:

Okay, you know what everybody wants to Dream Team. And that's there to give everybody that dream team. I love it. I love it. Okay, so then let's dive in to imposter syndrome a little bit. So what like, how would you even define the term imposter syndrome? Because I feel like it's one of those terms. That's almost like, fake. It's almost like this, like, creation that somebody made feeling like, like, they just needed to call with their feeling something. I feel like everybody sort of has a different definition of what imposter syndrome is. So I would love to know what like how would you define that term?

Stefanie O'Donnell:

Yeah, I mean, imposter syndrome to me is like just like feeling like a fraud like feeling like every time you go somewhere show up somewhere, someone's gonna figure you out that you have no idea what you're actually doing. So that I mean, I felt like that for a long time.

Jessi Cabanin:

So like, where, where or like, when in your life or your business? Like when do you think that you first experienced that field?

Stefanie O'Donnell:

Yeah, I mean, I feel like as soon as I so I stayed home with my kids prior to being a photographer, I was home with them for five years prior to going back into the field, my son is going to be eight. So I feel like the first second I decided to become a photographer because I have no actual photography, training. I don't didn't go to school for it. So when I launched my business, I was like, oh my god, people are gonna think that I have like, no idea what I'm talking about. And really, I did it, to be honest. I mean, it's I'm still growing and learning but, um, but yeah, I mean, every time I went to a session, the first year, I would get stomach gigs. When I pull up the things be like, Oh my God, they're so and so's brother's gonna be a photographer, and he's gonna know that I don't know everything there is to know about photography. So it started right from the get go.

Jessi Cabanin:

Spoiler alert, I shot weddings for 10 years and even in the last wedding, I shot I still felt like sick showing up just

Stefanie O'Donnell:

just like this, like someone's gonna be there. No,

Jessi Cabanin:

I mean, like, spoiler alert, a you're not alone and beyond that doesn't really ever go away in a certain aspect. I mean, I I totally hear you in the aspect of like, I didn't go to school for photography. I mean, I personally went to school for design Sure, but like I taught myself how to shoot from the get go. Like I fully taught myself how to be a photographer. So I completely completely connect with that because it you know, it took a really long time for me to feel I mean, even still, today I get nervous before rebranding shoots, but I think I've kind of turned that into more of like an excitement kind of nervous than a like, oh my god, everybody thinks I'm a fraud kind of nervous.

Stefanie O'Donnell:

So like, if anything like remotely unique to what I'm like really used to I'm like, oh, like, shoot, I don't know what I you know, fully what I'm doing. But the reality is the people that you're shooting they're hiring you for you

Jessi Cabanin:

For sure. Do you feel like? Do you feel like imposter syndrome sometimes triggers when you're in a position where you sort of feel like you want to try something new in your business, and like, you're afraid to try it. And so you kind of just like, look to whatever one else is doing to like 100%

Stefanie O'Donnell:

I mean, a big thing with imposter syndrome is comparing yourself to everybody else. Like you're like, oh, like so and so like, I did that a lot in the beginning, because you want to get inspiration, you want to see what's out there and whatever, but you're looking at people's business, who have maybe been in the business for 15 years. I mean, you were you were a photographer who I looked at like I loved your work your newborn work, and it's funny because I would have had no idea that you were like over the newborn. You were like a photographer that it lives up and I'm like, oh my god, like but how long did you bet you've been doing it? You know? And I'm like, I'm trying to compare myself I'll never get there like my work is terrible compared to hers but like the reality of it is your work was not that great. Probably your one either.

Jessi Cabanin:

Oh my gosh, I you know, I see some people posting their like, how it started and how it's going like typographers posting that and I'm just like, No, I'm not playing this game. I don't. I don't feel comfortable showing you what I was just

Stefanie O'Donnell:

looking at my work. And I put that out there being like, I think this is a great photo. So I always think about it too. And now when I post and like, I'm posting pictures that I think are wonderful that other photographers might look at, and like,

Jessi Cabanin:

what's funny is that like places like social media, Facebook, especially Facebook, never forget, you know, and like, I have clients who will like repost something from literally like 2010. And then they'll tag me and I'll be like, Oh, my gosh, that's great. And you know what something i i teach in all of my business coaching is that there's a time and a place for researching your competition and looking to others for inspiration, there is a time and a place for that. And it is completely different, to look into other businesses into what they're doing, to kind of inspire yourself or to just kind of like look for inspiration. But that does not equal imposter syndrome. And I think that in today's world, sometimes with the extent of this imposter syndrome, like term, I think that people start to feel overwhelmed and feel like they're doing something wrong by looking at other people's work. And I kind of want to break that stigma because hey, listen, if you want to look at my work, to be inspired to, like, learn something new, or do something better, like hey, good for you, then I feel like I'm doing my job. I want people to be looking for inspiration

Stefanie O'Donnell:

too the difference between you and like, like, instead of looking and comparing, like reach out to them, like collaborate with them. Like right now we live in a society where it's community over competition, like, I'm not afraid to go to you and ask you, Hey, like, what do you use here? What lines most photographers that I've come across are pretty open about what they use and how they learned and what systems they use. And, you know, I didn't learn Google, it's everything. I pretty much started my entire business on YouTube, you know, like,

Jessi Cabanin:

and you're not alone, that you are not alone. There are so many people who have started their photography business like that, but I love what you said about just like reaching out to them, like, don't be afraid if they say no, and they're not like into teaching then like, hey, that's cool. But like some of us are actually out there to purposely inspire other people and to purposely help people get to the next level of their business. So no, I love that. I love that. So where like, when when you were in that phase, like how did it feel like how were you? Like, how was it affecting you on like, a day to day basis? Awful.

Stefanie O'Donnell:

I mean, it feels awful when you're in it, because you're just like, I think a lot of it is just confidence to it. Because like, I didn't believe in myself as a photographer. So therefore, like, if I don't believe in myself, why should anybody else believe me, you know, believe in me, so I would be going to shoot tonight, like, oh my god, I'd be so nervous. But the thing for me is like, as soon as I got to a shoot, it was like, it turned completely off. Like I am good at what I do. When I when I'm in front of people, I'm a people person, I could talk to anybody under the sun about anything. So when I got there, it was never a problem. But the car rides there were dreadful, like I would be sitting with, like, my stomach would be turning, I'd be like, Oh my god, like, this is me, someone's gonna figure this out. And for why it was like a first year. And then after the first year, it was like anytime I did any session that wasn't like, if I saw you for like a senior session, like I don't do senior portraits that often. So it's like, but now that's kind of where I'm at, where I'm like, I'm not going to do the things that I'm not super great at anymore, I'm gonna refer them, I'm not going to do a brand new shoot, I'm gonna send them to you, because that's what your specialty is. That's the point of niching down and figuring out what you're really good at. You don't have to have imposter syndrome anymore. Because you're going to specialize in your thing. And you're going to do that really good.

Jessi Cabanin:

Absolutely, absolutely. And I always encourage people to do a multitude of things, to really kind of break down what they do love because like as a multi passionate I take on so many projects. And it's not I mean, half of it is because I thrive and being busy. I thrive and being in a million directions. But it's also for me to be able to really kind of like pinpoint what I'm good at and what is meaningful to me. So like that's a whole nother story for a whole nother day. How so like you said, like you were in it for about like the first year, was there a specific moment or like some specific thing that happened that changed that for you that you like got out of that feeling?

Stefanie O'Donnell:

Yeah, I mean, I feel like just getting booked on a consistent basis helps. I feel like once I started getting bookings every month, and you know, consistently showing up and making money I'm okay, like, I'm I'm obviously somewhat good. It's hard for me to even say out loud that I forgot to talk. It's easy, but like, it's as long as people are booking you and they showing up they like who you are, they support what you do. And you know, that was like I'm like, okay, I can do this. Like it gave giving me the confidence in myself that like I don't suck at what I'm doing. Okay. People are bugging me because they liked me and they like what I'm putting out there they're seeing my work so I feel like it was

Jessi Cabanin:

a transition that you just sort of like I don't know, like a come to Jesus moment one day or do you feel like I don't were like listening to a podcast or something that just kind of like something just kind of triggered you.

Stefanie O'Donnell:

Honestly. I feel like it just kind of trickled out I don't think there was like a certain moment where I was like, Okay, now I don't have imposter syndrome. It was just kind of like I just kept. Well, first of all, you get so busy too, that you don't have time to think anymore. Like, you're just you're just showing up, it's probably happened in the fall. I have so many sessions that I have no time to think about in classes totally show up and you do it. And then after you do it for so long, it's just like, now I'm super comfortable. Like there's not, I mean, I always want to learn new things. So sometimes when I tried to, like, start a new idea, like, like, I'm, like, I'm gonna shoot this way, I will still get that a little bit, but I recover a lot easier now.

Jessi Cabanin:

Yeah. What do you what would you say is like the number one thing you learned from it from, like, the journey of being in it and get out of it?

Stefanie O'Donnell:

I think the the main thing is that you don't have to be an expert at what you do to do it. I feel like you don't have to know everything. You don't have to have a plan, just do it. Just go follow your heart, follow your dreams, if you're passionate about it. I knew nothing. And three years ago, when I started, I didn't even know how to shoot my my camera in manual mode. So I literally had to learn from ground zero at 30 some odd years old, like I'm 35 now. So I was like 3132. And I never, I think that I just never considered myself. Like I get emotional talking about that I never considered myself like smart or I never in a million years would have thought I could run a successful business and make more money than I ever did in corporate America. Like it's wild to me, you just have to follow and be passionate about it and just follow like what your gut says and just do it like, like, let it go. Stop comparing yourself and just get out of your own damn way. Yes, girl. Yes,

Jessi Cabanin:

I love that. And just kind of like picking your dream, you know, and just kind of the rest comes later. Like the rest will follow when you're really passionate about something and you just kind of feel it in your body that this is right, the rest comes. So like

Stefanie O'Donnell:

we're talking about this, like my brother, like buy my name and my business. I was like, I don't I can't launch my business until I have a name. And he's like, knock it off. Just name it Stephanie O'Donnell photography and just start doing it, or else you're never gonna do it. Just do it.

Jessi Cabanin:

Yes, exactly. And I love that. And I feel like that is something that people get really stuck with people get really caught up in trying to make sure that they have the perfect name for something. And what I always tell people is really create your mission, your your like mission statement first. Because your your name will come from why you're doing what you're doing. If you are in business, just to make money, you will likely experience burnout so fast, because you are not passionate about what you're doing. I'm not saying that you can't do things just to make money. I mean, obviously, we all have to make money, especially in this role. I mean, it's $5 to $5 a gallon to fill up your gas tank right now, I get that. But in the long game, I'm doing something, especially creating a business, especially being an entrepreneur, you don't just get into entrepreneurship to make money, like you have to you have to have passion behind it to, um, to like, get the long game. So I think I think that's, I think that's amazing. Um, how would you say so like, you talk about, you know, showing up authentically and, you know, kind of transforming yourself out of imposter syndrome by showing up authentically, what does that look like for you? Like, what is it about you that when you show up authentically that, like, makes you stand out from everybody else?

Stefanie O'Donnell:

Sure. Um, I mean, I think I'm just like, really honest with like, my community, I feel like I do a really good job of just showing up telling who I am. And I, you know, we've struggled with a bunch of miscarriages, which was, you know, and I'm open about that on my page. Not everybody is comfortable that but I am for me, it's therapeutic to talk about it. So I talk about the struggles that we're going through as a family because people can relate to that. And I have a huge a part of my business is I love newborns so much, because that is something that I do not take for granted for one second, like I know, bringing a life into this world is a freaking gift. And I love being there to capture that moment for families. And there's nothing better for me and I and I think people know that because I'm so honest and open about our situation and people like Isn't it hard to photograph newborns and you still want a baby No, like, it's not for me because I love watching your family get this beautiful gift and, and I'd like to I do a ton of like you were talking about, I do a lot of work for the community and give back to organizations. And that's a huge passion of mine and always has been. So I feel like just showing up and telling, like my community that I am also when I make, the more I make, the more I can get like there was there was a podcast that I listened to once and I was like, instead of financial goals for my business, I want it to be giving goals like if I make an X amount, I can give more so like it's great if I can have better giving goals so that I can do photoshoots for free or get back to you know, in certain ways. Like that's my my thing i The more I can do for the community, the more literally lights my soul on fire. It's a selfish act. Really.

Jessi Cabanin:

Well, that's, that's amazing. Who you who you just touch really briefly on some of the philanthropy stuff that you're working on right now.

Stefanie O'Donnell:

Yeah, so um, well, I'm doing a breast cancer walk in September so my aunt passed away 17 years ago now and that's where I started my whole like that when there was a time I went from a selfish kid to like literally pouring myself into trying to cure cancer single handedly, I have done, you know, countless walks. So that's the three day Susan G. Komen walk, I've done it before, but I haven't done it since I had kids, that was eight plus years ago. So I'm like, it's gonna be a whole different beast this year, you have to raise $2,300 To walk and my goal is $10,000. So I will be doing, you know, I did like a Super Bowl, square, fundraiser, whatever. But with my photography, I'm going to at some point be doing some sort of session where the money will be donated for the walk. And then I want to do something with seniors. I know, you know, this, but I have a passion for photographing Not, not seniors in high school, but seniors, as in anybody over the age of like, I don't want to say a number because people are listening, if they're that age, they're gonna but I'm not a senior. But the elderly community. I just got grandparents, like, we don't take enough professional pictures of our grandparents. And there's something so special about their hands and the age on their face. Like it's beautiful to me. And I know, like when a lot of people get to that age, they don't want photographs of themselves. But the first thing we do, and this is morbid to talk about. But the first thing we do when somebody passes away is we look for photos. So I really, it's a passion of mine to photograph as many elderly people as possible. That's amazing, sort of

Jessi Cabanin:

work with that. That's amazing. It's like you're creating your own niche and like and like we talked about before, when you have a passion for something like you can make it happen, the rest will follow. You just sort of, you know, kind of like go after that. Would you say like, do you feel like imposter syndrome? trickles over into your personal life as well? Like, does it does it trickle over at all into your full venture? Philanthropy? Like those things that you're doing? I feel

Stefanie O'Donnell:

like I've been doing it for so long now that so in the beginning, when I would raise money, I didn't Oh, my God, like people are gonna think but like, I'm not asking for anything for myself. Like, I'm not asking for anybody to give me $50 For me to use my bank account. So like, when I go out there, I have no problem putting it out on my social media and asking people for donations, because people are, they want to help people want to be involved. And they don't want to be me going out asking for them. They just want to give money. You know, a lot of people don't feel comfortable asking, but they have no problem donating 20 $50. So, I mean, I used to in the beginning, but now I just And if people don't want to there's no offense taken by me, I don't matter to me at all. I love the fact though that now I have a gift and a talent that I can offer in return for people's donation. It's a very cool thing to watch my two, like two worlds collide. Yeah, for sure, be able to provide photos, and then raise money at the same time. It's like the coolest thing for me. So

Jessi Cabanin:

yes, for sure. I love that. And as a business owner, I'm always looking for ways to give back as well. I mean, let's be real, it's a tax write off to so you know, like, there's, there's always a certain amount of money that I also set giving goals for the year of like, how much can I just give back to, you know, multiple, you know, multiple causes and things like that. So as business owners to, you know, like, we're always looking for ways to kind of like, put our money in places that helps others but also helps us to start. Yeah, for sure. Well, also, I feel like as a business owner, when I am choosing to invest in some of these like, causes and stuff like that, I feel like the choices are made by the connections that I feel with those people. And so like you said before, where you are so open and so honest about your story and why you're doing what you're doing. Um, that's a whole nother topic for another day. But like, if you are not being honest and open and out there, you are seriously missing out on potential, potential customers potential clients potential, just opportunities in general. So what I'm going to do is I'm going to have Stephanie actually add the link to her to her walk through the bottom of this video right now. Because if anybody is watching this, and also kind of, you know, connects with this or is interested in being part of giving back to something, I think this is an amazing, amazing place for them to do that if they feel that connection. So I think that's I think that's also sweet.

Stefanie O'Donnell:

Yeah, a little wine, the walk, you don't have to donate, you can join me and walk with me,

Jessi Cabanin:

because I'm not walking that many wild by myself. So how many how many miles is that it's the miles over. Today, I'm out, I'm out.

Stefanie O'Donnell:

I was gonna say to Jessie, I feel like it's important to to note that you don't have to be open about your struggles. If it's not something that you are comfortable sharing. And people are, I have met so many people who messaged me about like my miscarriages and stuff who are definitely not at a place where they'll ever talk about it in public. Sometimes they don't even tell their own family about it. You don't have to be willing to be that vulnerable to connect to people. It doesn't have to be that deep of a level but just have some sort of vulnerability and openness even if it's just about your business or whatever your day to day life. Like it doesn't have to be so personal in order to get that connection. So I just wanted to know that.

Jessi Cabanin:

Yeah, for sure. And I feel like that's a great point in just sort of like what I'm trying to accomplish with some of these conversations too is that even if it opens up the door for somebody to message me or you or whoever I'm speaking with about these topics, even if it opens the door for someone to reach out, that is starting a conversation that is sort of starting to break down that wall, that stigma that, like, we're not allowed to talk about these things. And that is the ultimate goal. So like, I really hope that anybody that's watching this kind of has that sort of feeling of like, okay, it feels good. I'm not alone, you know, all these things. So, for everybody listening, Stephanie, what advice like what maybe like one or two top pieces of advice would you give to them? If they're also feeling like they're sort of like stuck in this imposter syndrome? struggle right now?

Stefanie O'Donnell:

Yeah, I mean, I feel like just get out of your own head about it. Stop comparing, stop looking at other people's stuff that's triggering to you. If you find when you're scrolling, you're getting triggered by things just unfollow it, silence it, whatever. Um, I noticed that I had to get off of social media for the most part, I'll go on, and I'll post but then I get off of it. And I try to only touch base maybe once a day to check my messages. But I can't scroll because it's not healthy for me. And I live in Chicago. I don't live in a nice mountainy area. It's frustrating sometimes. And I'm like, I want to make a pretty big shower. But I've got Busey one.

Jessi Cabanin:

I've got snow in March. That is that do

Stefanie O'Donnell:

and then just go for it. Like just follow your dreams. Follow your heart, follow your passion, nobody. You nobody cares about you, like nobody's thinking about you. Like that's the reality of it is we are so worried about what other people think. But the truth is, nobody thinks about you. So,

Jessi Cabanin:

oh my god. That that is like Game Changing right there. That is such a fact. And that is something that is so overlooked, that everybody is so worried about what everybody else is thinking about them. And the hard part truth of that is no bunny cares. Nobody is actually thinking about you, you are literally making it up. And I think that's such a great point. Because I think especially as women, we get caught up in that way too much. We get caught up with too much in what people think about the way we look, the way we talk the business we're running the money we charge whatever it is, we are so caught up in it. And the reality of the situation is that nobody really cares. Like it's literally like just you making that up. And I'm I love what you said about just sort of like stopping following people that trigger you. And the only point that I will add on to that, that I feel like helped me get out of that struggle was coming to terms and being honest with yourself about the fact that you are in that struggle. Like I think I spent so much time trying to convince myself that I wasn't struggling that I wasn't suffering from this like crazy imposter syndrome, I was spending so much time convincing myself that I was fine. That once I finally came to terms with the fact that I was like, wow, I am really deep in like, feeling like nothing and feeling like everything I look at is better than me once I owned the fact that I felt that way. Um, that was when I started to finally be able to sort of, like, take steps to get out of that. So um,

Stefanie O'Donnell:

and that's hard to do. It's like, hard to notice that, like, because it's very hard to do is to go out and look at stuff. But then when it becomes unhealthy, that's when you need to get rid of it.

Jessi Cabanin:

For sure. And I mean, I think it gets unhealthy before you want to really admit that. But when it gets to like level two unhealthy is sort of when you can get out. Yeah, you can't like ignore that anymore. And when you just start to feel something's off, just acknowledge it, acknowledge the fact that you're feeling that way and acknowledge the fact that it's okay to feel that way. It's like there's nothing wrong with you for feeling that way. Everybody feels that so if even if you are not in a place in your business, or your life right now, where you may be suffering from this, like you might be sitting there like Yeah, fine, I'm cool. But like, you will reach a point in your life and your business where you feel this way it is inevitable everybody ever

Stefanie O'Donnell:

go to the next level, right? Like even just raising my prices. It was like, oh my god now all over again, like people are gonna be like, Why are you charging that much you didn't charge that much two years ago, but like, I know, my worth, I set my price based on my cost of doing business. Like I know, I'm confident in my pricing, but it's still you so you're always no matter what people who are at the highest level of businesses talk about how they still suffer from imposter syndrome. So

Jessi Cabanin:

for sure, for sure. And like Do you Do you feel that like like you just said, We, for those of you that don't know, we just redeveloped Stephanie's entire website we restructured all of her pricing and do you feel like having that come up again? Do you feel like you were better equipped to recognize that and get out of that faster? Like did you sort of almost realize you have a rinse and repeat process for kind of like

Stefanie O'Donnell:

your like I feel like this time around it's kind of like maybe because I have consistent bookings too i I'm not so worried about the money aspect of it so like I am I'm booking enough where I don't have to be like oh my god I need every single so I can be like confidently be like you know what, this is my pricing and I don't need to take every single thing that comes my way like the hard part is choose I'm such a people pleaser. And I love everybody. I want to take it all on but like knowing that I have to set boundaries in my business because I'm when I'm Saying yes to this session, I'm saying no to my family. And the reality of it is to is when I say yes to a session and give a discount in the fall, then when somebody comes and reaches out who would have paid full price? I'm missing that. Yeah, for sure. It's a hard. It's a hard balance. But yeah, I feel definitely more. I have more strategies now to talk myself out of

Jessi Cabanin:

For sure. And what you just said, I think sort of opened up a if you guys don't know me, right now, my mind is constantly kind of like developing new things. So when she just said that, I now have an idea for another coffee combo, where we can specifically talk about setting boundaries for people pleasing traits, like people pleasers unite, because this is gonna be where we kind of talk about Jessie. I'm very much the same way. I totally get that. I think everybody struggles with boundaries in in, in some capacity. But I love what you just said about that. Because I think so many people can connect with that, because I feel like that is a very common trait. And kind of like developing ways to manage that. And set boundaries is something that people will totally connect with. So be on the lookout folks, because that's gonna be another conversation at some point in time. All right. Well, thank you so much for chatting with me this morning, Stephanie, I super appreciate it. We just broke ground to this brand new idea of empowering coffee conversations. I cannot believe we did it. Hopefully it's like actually recording and is on social media, we'll find out. I know so many people are going to be able to connect with this conversation, because I know that I personally experienced a lot of it. I know other people who have experienced it. So I really, really hope that you guys enjoy this episode. If you have any takeaways or any connections to this, please drop a comment right below the video in here. If this triggers a whole new topic for you, like it did for me, please drop it in the comments so we can set up that coffee conversation. Because like I said, this entire platform is really, really built to just start talking about the shit that nobody wants to talk about. Okay? Yes, it's uncomfortable sometimes. Yes, it's, it's hard. But the more we talk about it, the easier it becomes. Okay. All right. Thank you so much. You guys. Stephanie. One last thing if somebody is watching this and they want to connect with you, what is the best way for them to reach out to you or kind of connect with you?

Stefanie O'Donnell:

They should go to my brand new fabulous website. It's stefanieodonnellphotography.com I am on Facebook at Stefanie O'Donnell photography. I am Stefanie with an F

Jessi Cabanin:

ohh she fancy. We will drop we will drop the links below below the video here. But Stephanie, thank you so so much for bringing growl at me this morning. I know she has a kiddo at home right now too. But you guys, that's life. We pivot we move on and we make it work. So thank you guys so so much, Stephanie. Thank you so much. Have a fabulous day, everybody. All right, babe. I hope you really enjoyed today's conversation. I am super curious to know what your biggest takeaway was from today. So go ahead and share this episode on social media. Be sure to tag me at this weight of fabulous and let me know what you connected with. What did you learn from this episode? And what action item are you going to take today? Until next time, guys, keep pushing, keep dreaming and let's keep on redefining fabulous chat soon guys.