9 Tips to Avoiding Boss Babe BURNOUT!

Do you build your business around your personal life? Or do you build your personal life, around your business? On today's episode, I've got 9 ways for you to battle the ugly headed...Boss Babe Burnout.  You may be in it right now...and it may seem impossible to get out of, but with these tips, you can do it. I believe in you!
 
Sometimes all we need is a little perspective, or even a little reminder to put ourselves first. If you haven't experience burnout yet, I guarantee you will feel it at some point in your life, so today's conversation is the perfect way to plan for it.

Until next time babe, keep pushing, keep dreaming, and let's keep on redefining fabulous.
 
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Transcript

Jessi Cabanin: 0:04

Hey girl, hey, are you ready for some real talk? If you are a female entrepreneur who has ever felt like a total failure, or maybe even a frequent flyer of imposter syndrome, this podcast is for you. I'm your host Jesse. I'm millennial business owner, boy mom and creative genius helping women bring their business dreams to life. After 10 years of building numerous creative brands from the ground up, I'm ready to get real about what actually goes on behind the scenes of building your very own empire failure opened a brand new mindset for me and I really want that for you too, because honestly, I am just so over society's definition of what it means to live a successful life. So together, we are going to create and navigate a version of success that works for you. Together, we can redefine fabulous Okay, babe, I am so excited for today's episode because today we are talking about something that not everybody really likes to talk about. Okay, we are talking about boss babe burnout. And you might be out there thinking, Oh, I'm good. You know, like, I feel fine. I feel good with my you know, the way that I'm running my business. But guess what, guys, every buddy experiences this at one time or another. So even if you are not experiencing it right now, I guarantee you we'll get to a time in your business that you are feeling that way. And so today we are going to talk about nine ways to avoid the boss babe burnout. Okay, so without further ado, let's dive in. Okay, number one on the agenda today is asking for help. And I know that this is like a really big way to start this episode, because asking for help is something that none of us really like to do. I mean, raise your hand if you like to ask for help is I do not like to ask for help. I like to do everything by myself. I mean, I am okay asking for help and certain things. But ultimately, I want to be the one to do it. And so, but asking for help is going to be something that will completely transform your business and honestly your life. Okay? Screw fear, screw your pride and ask for help. Okay, so here are a couple ways that you can do that. Number one is going to be hiring someone. Okay? Now I know that not everybody is always in a position to do any hiring. And that's okay. Okay, I'm not saying that you have to, you know, dump all your money into hiring a full time person. You can if you're at that point, but hiring contractors is actually a really efficient way to spend your money on specific kinds of things without feeling like you're really paying for someone to kind of sit around and do nothing when things are slow. Okay, so contractors typically have contracts that they are X amount of hours per week, per month, maybe they just do certain things, maybe they do a lot of things, whatever it is, you kind of get to choose those things. But like on an life level, some of these things might include a cleaning service maybe once or twice a month, or even a meal delivery service, anything to just sort of help you kind of take a little bit of time back and make things just a little bit easier for you. Alright, so next up, we are going to talk about networking. Okay, so utilizing your network as a way to ask for help is kind of a way to ask for help without asking for help, and ways that you can do this and you can collaborate with other businesses, you can host guest speakers, you can participate in, like social takeovers, or you can even schedule monthly meetups with like minded individuals. Okay, so the cool thing about networking is that what happens when you collaborate with another business is you sort of double up on your marketing without paying for advertising. Okay, so what you're doing is you sort of end up introducing each other to your separate followings. And in that you're now reaching new people, you're promoting not only your service, but the other person service, maybe people end up booking both of you. That's cool. Like, that's maybe not the goal when you're doing it, but like, that's very, very much what happens a lot of times. So networking is a great place to ask for help without actually asking for help. Last up on this topic, seek out the professionals okay, this might be outsourcing projects that you are spending way too much time trying to figure out when it would really be more efficient use of your money and your time, if you brought somebody else in to do a project for you. Okay? An example of that is accounting. I hate numbers. I hate Excel. I just I do not thrive in that atmosphere. So that is somewhere where I brought in a professional to do that work for me because it does not serve me to spend my time doing that when I could be doing a million other things in actual billable hours instead of paying hours. So another great example of that is my clients. My clients do not want to spend the time trying to bring their idea to life visually, because that's just not what they're the best at. So they bring me in to do those things. For them. SEO is another great example of that it is a pain in the ass. So nobody really wants to actually have to spend the time on it, boom, that's where I come in, in your personal life that might include hiring a personal trainer or going to therapy. These are things that are really not talked about that much to be honest. But they're very important to both your mental and physical well being. All right, up next, number two is take control of your schedule. Okay? This may seem really overwhelming, but I'm going to make this very quick and simple for you. There are two ways to look at this and to kind of live your business life, okay, you can either schedule your life around your business, or you can schedule your business around your life. Okay, I have lived this both ways. I am not going to sit here and say that there is a right or wrong specifically. But I will tell you that after years and years and years of being the person scheduling my life around my business, it is now a very, very high priority goal for me to start to build my business around my life, because I will tell you that scheduling your life around your business is exhausting. It may not seem like it right now. But 10 years down the line, you are going to realize that you missed out on so many opportunities, because you were too busy making sure that your business was your number one priority. And let's be honest, as women, we really need to be the number one priority, we cannot run our businesses efficiently if we do not show up for ourselves, okay, so I am strongly encouraging you to take a step towards building your business around your life instead of vice versa. Okay, moving on to number three is learning how to think outside the box, it's really easy to get overwhelmed, especially when you're in kind of like the depth of a burnout phase of your life or of your business. And there are some things that you just sort of need to put in your toolbox of being able to kind of talk yourself out of those situations. Okay, so I actually have a list on my desk. And it's something that I refer back to when I start to just kind of feel those feelings of overwhelm, and almost like numb, like, I can't do anything, even though I need to do a million things, my brain cannot focus on one thing. So I go to this list, and I kind of talk myself down. So I'm going to share some of those questions that I asked myself with you today. They may not work for everybody. There is no guarantee here. I am not a therapist, I'm just sharing with you what works for me. Okay, the first question I asked myself was, Is this a life or death situation? Nine times out of 10 it is not a life or death situation, boom, I'm already one point lower than I was before, of just being on like, the brink of like going crazy. Okay. The second thing I asked myself is, is what I'm doing right now something that I can stop and come back to. Okay, so like I said, there is times when I just cannot find that like true focus in my head for a project that I'm working on. And I will tell you, really, realistically, like, I do this on a daily basis where I might be working on the wrong project to where my brain is like, currently at now, there are obviously days where we have to work on the project at hand, because we have a deadline or because we have no choice. But to finish this project right now. I am a multi passionate, so I am constantly working on. Like, I'd say hundreds, but that's exaggerating, I am constantly working on at least 10 to 20 projects at one time. So for me, it is like it changes everything to be able to jump around when my brain is not doing like what I want it to be. So if I asked myself, can I stop and come back to this? A lot of times the answer is yes. And I can jump projects. And I find that I'm really efficient again. And then I start to kind of come down from that overwhelm a little bit more. Another question I asked myself is how can I make this more fun, okay, so sometimes what we're doing is just not fun. Okay? building websites is actually really fun. But the SEO aspect of it is not that fun. And so sometimes you really kind of just have to come up with ways to make what you're doing more fun. Maybe every time that you do a specific task, you get up and you dance around for a second, okay? It doesn't matter what it is, it's just kind of opening that mindset to the possibility of reframing in your mind what you're doing in a different manner so that you can sort of like, look at it from a different angle and sort of just like change your mindset. Okay, next question I asked myself was who can help me see this in a different way? Okay, so sometimes what happens in the depth of boss by burnout for me is that I lose my ability to like fully process, something that I'm working on. And so sometimes, I have to go to one of my go to people and say, like, Okay, here's where I'm stuck. I know I'm crazy. I know that this is like Super simple, but can you tell me what you see here? Or what you're hearing or kind of like what speaks to you right here because I need to see this from a different angle. Okay, the last thing I asked myself was, Can I change my environment? Now, that is not always a possibility. Okay, a lot of times, I need to be at my desk doing what I'm doing. However, what I've realized is that a lot of times when I'm working on projects in Canva, I can be working on those projects anywhere, I can take my laptop, my iPad, my phone, I can literally go anywhere, I can go outside, I can go to a co working space, I can go to somebody else's office, I can go lay in bed, which I do not recommend, because sometimes you fall asleep. But the reality of it is, do I have to be sitting right here doing what I'm doing right here. Okay, so sometimes a simple change of environment can make all of the difference. Okay, up next, number four is flipping the script. Okay, this kind of goes back to what we talked about. And number three, a little bit about thinking outside of the box. But the reality of the situation is that you control the way that you think about things. And you can change the way that you think about things. Okay, so what the number one thing I'm going to tell you in this aspect, because we're going to keep this part really short and simple is instead of thinking, why is this happening to me start thinking, what can I learn from this? Okay, so if I actually this is like a real time example. So in my office, I have terrible wiring. And so sometimes I'll be on my computer, and I will need to print something, and maybe I have a space heater on because it's chilly down here. And my boyfriend has a 3d printer going in here. Well, guess what, guys, when you do all of those things at one time, there goes the circuit, everything goes out, computer turns off, every project I was working on is suddenly gone. Okay. Now, that has happened to me so many times. And honestly, a lot of times, it's fine, because when your computer reboots, if I'm working on something online, it auto saves, but there's a lot of times where I lose everything, okay, it is the most stressful and just awful feeling of life. But in those moments, instead of being like, Ah, why is this happening to me? Instead, I tell myself, okay, what can I learn from this and what I learned from this is get this base here, the hell out of here. Every time you go to print something, make sure that everything else isn't going at the same time. Make sure that you're aware of when the 3d printer is running. Now this is obviously a very simple and sort of silly example but you get the idea in that when you sort of change the way that you're thinking about a situation you can completely resolve a situation or kind of bring yourself down just in one simple sentence. Okay, up next number five is ditching perfection. Okay, sometimes Done is better than perfect. Okay, I literally actually have this quote on a print like an art print in my room, because there are just times where I try to perfect something like no one's business and if you know me, that is just something that I do I just like everything to be perfect, but sometimes done needs to be better than perfect because sometimes trying to like strive for perfection is actually just holding you back not only are you wasting a lot of time, but you're totally missing out on other opportunities that could come while you're working on that now do not get me wrong. There is a time and a place for perfection. I am not saying that Done is better than perfect is a like foolproof quote for every aspect of like there's a time and place okay, but the majority of us when we start to feel that boss by burnout is because we are trying to do everything is so perfect that we are overanalyzing, okay. It is like analysis paralysis, okay? So I want to invite you to try when you feel like you are like stuck to just think about how you can get it done. And realize that Done is better than perfect. Okay, all right. Number six, you might really hate me for this one. But it's super, super simple. Okay, on freakin plug. Okay, there is a lot of things that we can get back in life, but time is not one of them. Whether that's spending time at work, spending time at home, spending time with a significant other spending time for ourselves, okay, it is so important to be able to unplug yourself from social media from your business. Okay? If you're an Apple user, I know that the newer iOS has a like a silencing notifications thing and I do use it however, I feel so much more absorbed in the projects that I'm working on when my phone is actually like gone like by gone in another room. So I highly encourage you to block out some time in your day to be able to just put your phone on the charger in another room and focus on what you're doing. Okay, moving on to number seven, which might actually be the most simple pourtant long your hair today but it is so important to remember your why. Okay? Now, this is something that you might be thinking like, Oh, I hear this all the time Jessi like, I am so done hearing this, I get it, I feel you, I was in a position where I did not really know my wife for almost 10 years, okay? I am really just swimming in my why, as of like a year ago, okay, so I get it, I get it. But I'm here to tell you that it is so important because it changes everything. It changes your ability to bring on new clients, it changes your ability to keep your passion in what you're doing, it changes being able to price yourself for what you think you actually are worth. Because when you don't know your why you lack a lot of like, that confidence in what you're worth. Okay. So, for me, my y definitely became being a source for women and being a place to help women succeed and to bring their life their dreams to life. Okay, so for me, I have 12 years of both success and failure. And I feel called upon at this point to help lead others away from doing some of the same mistakes that I made. Okay, I want you to get to the end faster than I did and with an easier experience than I did, because there are simple things that I could have researched and like, listen, like podcasts didn't exist back then. But, or maybe they did, but I just didn't know about them, whatever. But there are just things that I want you to have an easier time I want to give you the resource to reach that successful point. Okay, I have a huge passion for women empowerment. Okay, I am all about spreading the positivity, especially with women because it's always been in my blood. And even though it took me most of my life to realize that I now look back and realize that everything I did along the way had his piece of women empowerment, involved in it. Like it was always about women, it was always about making women feel confident, feel successful. And that is a huge, huge part of what I do. Okay. My last reason is my son, okay, I want to set an example there is nothing I want more than to teach him that anything is possible when you put in the hard work, okay, so when you know your why and when you live, your why the work becomes a lot easier and the overwhelm disappears. Alright, guys, we are almost there we are on number eight, and I am going to give you permission here. Okay, as women, a lot of times we feel like we need permission to do something. So I'm here today to give you permission, okay? It is perfectly okay to quit. Anything that no longer serves you. Okay, so the word quitting has such a just crappy stigma to it. I hate the way that people look at the word and the way that people use the word, okay? But it is perfectly okay to stop doing something that is not serving you anymore. Okay. Some of the things that I quit making sure that everyone is happy. Okay. Once again, this is an ongoing battle, but it is something that I finally come to terms with. And it is a trait that I carry very strongly that I have to put a lot of thought and effort into it, but I am working on it and making sure that everyone is happy is something that I am choosing to quit. Okay, the next thing I'm choosing to quit is fear of the future. Okay? If COVID has taught us anything, we have no freaking clue what's going to happen tomorrow. I don't have any freaking clue what's gonna happen in five minutes. Okay, so why am I going to waste my time and energy? worrying about the future? Okay, I'm developing into this, like, come what may we're, you know, we're gonna adapt. Okay, come on this journey with me, we'll do it together. Okay. Another thing is a task that you're not good at. Okay? Listen, I quit doing my accounting because listen, I hate numbers. It is perfectly okay for me to quit accounting, as long as I hire someone to do it, because yes, it still needs to get done. But it is perfectly okay for me to quit that to take that off of my personal roster. Okay. Two other very common things that are okay to quit are toxic relationships and negative self talk, okay, you get the idea. But I want you to sort of think about the word quitting. Right now I want you to just kind of like, close your eyes, unless you're driving, close your eyes and just sort of think about the word quitting and sort of re wire your brain to view that word a little bit differently. And then all of a sudden, you'll start to see the things that you are like, oh, yeah, I'm gonna quit that. I'm gonna quit that. I'm gonna quit that. I'm gonna quit that because guess what, if it's not serving you, it does not deserve to come into the future with you. Alright guys, last but not least, number nine, my personal favorite when in doubt, dance it out. Okay, I know that you probably think I'm crazy at this point and yet, guess what, that's okay. Because I am working on not caring what everybody else thinks of me and my choices, but hey, that's okay. Because it makes me feel an instant ease of anxiety and like mental pressure when I move my body and that that sort of like, free flow just kind of takes over my body and I can sort of feel the overwhelm and the stress just sort of like melting off. Okay, so I know it's really simple, but it is something that like, if I am super frustrated, I will just blast some Beyonce, get up on my chair and just start dancing it out. Alright, so just a quick recap of what we talked about today. And how to avoid that boss Babe burnout. Okay, number one, ask for help. Number two, own your schedule number three, learn to think outside the box. Number four, flip the script. Don't forget that mindset is everything. Okay, number five, ditch perfection Done is better than perfect girlfriend. Number six, schedule time to unplug number seven, remember your why. Number eight, quit anything that doesn't serve you anymore. And number nine, when in doubt, dance it out. All right, babe. I hope you really enjoyed today's conversation. I am super curious to know what your biggest takeaway was from today. So go ahead and share this episode on social media. Be sure to tag me at this way to fabulous and let me know what do you connected with? What did you learn from this episode and what action item are you going to take today? Until next time, guys, keep pushing, keep dreaming and let's keep on redefining fabulous chat soon guys.